I decided to call my friend, March ElGringoLoco, to discuss this year’s baseball playoffs.
Me: How’s it going. You know, the Twins won 88 games this year.
MEGL: 88, huh? Probably good for 3rd in the AL Central.
Me: Not really, actually, the Twins went 88-75
MEGL: 75? That means they played a one-game playoff? Lemme guess, they lost to the Mariners in the one-game shot for the Wild Card?
Me: No. The Mariners actually lost 100 games
MEGL: OK, Cleveland. Sabathia has pwn3d us the last few years.
Me: Well, Sabathia could win the Cy Young, but no, it wasn’t Cleveland, and it wasn’t for the Wild Card
MEGL: Again? Damn, I thought he would fall back to earth…and if it wasn’t for the Wild Card, it had to be for the Central. I guess the Tigers’ offense was just a little too much.
Me: No, actually, the Tigers finished in last.
MEGL: So we lost to the freaking Royals?
Me: Well, 2 of the last 3 at the Dome, but it was actually the White Sox. They ended up losing in the first round of the playoffs.
MEGL: Ha. Who’d they lose to? The Red Sox? The Yanks?
Me: Actually, the Rays.
MEGL: HAHAHAHAHA, no seriously.
Me: Yes, the Rayz. They won the East by 2 games over Boston.
MEGL: You mean the Yanks, right?
Me: No, Tampa Bay.
MEGL: So, you’re telling me that the Tigers finished in last, and the Rays finished in first? Whatcha gonna tell me next, Cliff Lee is the front-runner for the Cy Young?
Me: Well, actually—
MEGL: You’re kidding, right. I thought Sabathia was the Cleveland lefty that would win it.
Me: Sabathia may win the Cy Young. The NL Cy Young.
MEGL: Ah, he got traded. Probably to the Cubs, they needed some more pitching. Ryan Dempster as a starter? I bet that didn’t work out so well.
Me: Dempster was actually very good. Actually, Sabathia went to the Brewers.
AEGL: Sonofa—-
Me: Easy, easy, this is a G-rated blog.
AEGL: Fine, fine. How did Johan do?
Me: Very well. Led the league in ERA, even pitched a complete-game shutout on the next-to-last-day of the season.
AEGL: Guess it makes sense, the Mets probably wouldn’t start the playoffs until Thurs—
Me: Actually, the Mets didn’t make the playoffs. They blew another lead down the stretch.
AEGL: Willie Randolph should be fired.
Me. He was. In June. He was replaced by Jerry Manuel.
AEGL: HAHAHAHAHA. No wonder, his Zen bullcrap never did work with the White Sox.
Me: Actually, Manuel led the Mets to the 3rd best record in the majors down the stretch. He even referred to Johan as “gangsta.”
AEGL: Well, I’ll be damned. So, I’m guessing the Cubs are fixing to win the World Series now. It’s been 100 years.
Me: Actually, they were swept by the Dodgers. James Loney hit a grand slam in Game 1 that really turned momentum, and Manny hit 2 absolute bombs in the first two games at Wrigley.
AEGL: Manny? Is that your nickname for Andre Ethier or something?
Me: Actually, Manny Ramirez got traded to the Dodgers in a 3-way deal that sent Jason Bay to Boston.
AEGL: So…the Red Sox traded Manny for Jason Bay? I bet that cost them.
Me: Actually, Boston had a better winning percentage with Bay than Ramirez. Heck, Bay even hit 2 homers against the Angels in the first round of the playoffs and scored the Series clinching run.
AEGL: Wait…you’re telling me the Cubs got eliminated and the Red Sox beat the Angels in the playoffs? I guess some things never do change.